In a recent edition of the House of Hardcore Podcast, former ECW and WWE star and recent AEW Casino Battle Royal at Double or Nothing, Tommy Dreamer spoke about a number of topics but was most candid about the battle he suffers from depression. He opened up about his own mental health and how at one point considered committing suicide at WrestleMania X-7 and going as far as murdering Paul Heyman in the process. Depression just appear as it is a lifelong internal battle of voices telling you what to do and
“This is crazy for me to admit it but I am doing this for a reason, just like I admitted to other things previously. “Wrestlemania (X-Seven) in Houston, Paul Heyman told me I was going to debut – all this stuff when they had TLC, and Spike Dudley came in, and Rhyno came in, and Lita came in. That was supposed to be my spot and then that got ixnayed. Then they’re going to do this whole hardcore, 24/7 thing that is, ‘Gonna be all about you.’ That was when I was supposed to debut”.
It was this decision that was made seemingly sent Dreamer over the edge of how he was thinking at the time. He read a local sign about firearms and it appeared to fuel his growing frustration about the decision that was changed.
“I remember I did a show there, and I saw a sign that said ‘Guns Welcome’ and I was in Houston. I did an indie show, and I said, ‘What is this? I’m from New York, what do you mean, ‘Guns Welcome?” And they said, ‘Oh you are allowed to bring a firearm into the venue.’ And I was right across the street from the Astrodome. When I tell you it resonated in my head so, so much”.
Dreamer then goes into details of how he planned on executing it at the time. Readers, please be aware of potentially sensitive material below.
“I’ll tell you what I wanted to do – it’s sick that I think this. At WrestleMania, I was gonna hop the rail and I was gonna whack Paul E. in the back of the head right at the announce table. Then, I was going to whack myself, be an ultimate martyr – hit my pose, crack, boom, pull the trigger. Because I was that insane in thought. Don’t know if I would have went through with it, but that’s what I was thinking about every day leading up to this. I was like, ‘I will go down in history.’ Hit my pose, pop, boom. First, they’d think it as an angle, until I shot him.”
Madison’s Mindset: Tommy Dreamer is brave to share his thoughts and doing so makes a great statement about the severity dealing with these issues can be. It is a testament to him to share what he has experienced so that it others are educated. At one-time suicide was seen as a cowards act but our education around it has clearly changed. More continues to take place in putting resources to making people aware and providing the necessary help to those in need.