Tonight is the go home show of IMPACT Wrestling “A Night You Can’t Mist” the one night only PPV featuring wrestling legend the Great Muta and a main event between The Rascalz and LAX. What will the stars of IMPACT have in store?
Tonight’s show kicks off with Ace Austin. His opponent for the night is Cousin Jake, accompanied to the ring by Cody Deaner. Austin is very much outsized in the contest. Austin starts the match with some pushups before being lifted by Jake and pushed into the corner. Austin pushes Jake to little effect. He rolls around his opponent attempting a drop toe hold. Cousin Jake is just too big to take down blocking everything Austin throws at him. Austin eventually hits a headscissor taking down his larger opponent. Austin tries for a roll up but, again, Jake is too big. Ace Austin lands a kick to the back of the leg putting Jake on one knee. Austin hits a short dropkick that just serves to anger his opponent. Nothing he does is having a great effect on Cousin Jake. Jake backdrops Austin who crawls to the rope. Jake charges in as Austin pulls down the rope dropping his opponent to the floor angering the Deaner giant. Austin attempts a dive but Cousin Jake slides back into the ring.
Back in the ring, Jake is hit with chops and a back elbow from Austin. Jake pushes his opponent into the rope and charges. Again Austin lowbridges his opponent and he falls to the outside. On the apron, Austin flips over his opponents attempt to grab him. He lands a kick that shakes up Cousin Jake. Austin dives over the top rope into the waiting arms of his opponent. Cousin Jake leaves Austin prone on the apron after a backbreaker style drop. He backs up the ramp running full steam and splashing into a crumpled mass that is Austin.
Cousin Jake rolls his opponent back into the ring for a quick two count. Austin gets up only to be whipped into the corner. He avoids disaster ducking through the ropes climbing the turnbuckle. The attempt at a heelkick is stopped by the large charging body of his opponent. Cousin Jake goes to the opposite corner before charging again at his opponent who slips out the way laying across the top rope “HBK style” before taking out his signature playing card. He gives Jake a nasty paper cut with the card. Austin hits a flying corner in the corner putting down his opponent before delivering a spinning leg drop. He mounts his opponent driving his knees into the joints. He keeps on the offense keeping his weight on the back applying any hold that he can while Jake struggles to stand.
Jake finally gets up shrugging off his opponent. Austin gets to feet missing an axe handle but hitting a chop that angers Jake. He was better of another chop opting instead to go to the corner. Jake follows him in but misses as Austin goes between the ropes. Austin gets the two count off a springboard roll up. Austin hits a spinning kick against Jake then plants him with a double knee takedown. Jake pops back up with a huge lariat as Austin goes for another big charging maneuver.
Both men are down and stirring. Jake is up first. He misses a two strike attempts. Austin hits a knee strike holding his opponents wrist. Jake pulls him in as Austin goes for the Irish Whip. Jake takes him down a series of lariats. He spikes him with a Michonoku Drive for another nearfall. Jake is back up. He beils Austin into the corner and hits him with a big splash in the corner. The Desi Hit Squad are suddenly at ringside attacking Cody Deaner. Austin takes advantage of a distracted Cousin Jake hitting The Fold finisher for the three count
Melissa Santos interviews Knockouts Champion Tay Valkyrie. Taya talks her match with Rosemary. She’s “living her best life” while Rosemary obsesses over. She vows to take out the Demon Assassin in their match at A Night You Can’t Mist.
Up next is a nontitle match featuring Knockout Champion Taya Valkyrie who is really taking advantage of the one title defense per month rule. She faces Rosemary in a match that continues their long standing rivalry. Rosemary makes her way to the ring still dragging a collar and chained Su Yung behind her. Rosemary chains Su at ringside(to the great discomfort of Don Callis) before making her way into the ring.
Taya charges with a double leg takedown, mounting the Demon Assassin launching a series strike before dragging Rosemary to her feet to drag her into the corner. She hits massive elbows and kicks into the face of Rosemary. She hits her with a running hip bump then flying knees. She plays to the crowd giving Rosemary time to recover. Taya gets tied up in the “upside down” the illegal choke on the ropes. Rosemary climbs the to the top. Taya sidesteps the dive before hitting a German suplex leaving her opponent on the apron. Taya hits another chop before attempting to whip her opponent into the ropes. Instead, Rosemary reverses whipping the champ hitting her with an elbow. She ducks a clothesline attempt by Tay. Rosemary hits the reverse DDT for a two count. Rosemary hits a spear from the corner before pinning her opponent.
Taya kicks out as familiar music plays. Rosemary’s rival Jessica Havoc hits the ring with James Mitchell in tow. The two stare at one another in the ring before Rosemary throws a punch. Havoc grabs her fists headbutting her in the face and dropping her with a massive clothesline. She picks her up to deliver a devastating piledriver. Havoc then sets her sights on Taya Valkyrie chokeslamming the Knockouts Champion. She celebrates in the ring as James Mitchell frees Su Yung.
In the treehouse, the Rascalz each look pensive through the smoke. Dez, Wentz, and Trey are preparing for their tag title match. Trey feels left out. Dez and Wentz are taping up. Trey seems to develop a bit of a drinking problem…
Flashpoint moment of the night brought to you by Impact Plus. Muta vs. Mr. Ken…ANDERSON! They are doing a great job of promoting Muta and A Night You Can’t Mist
After the break, we come looking on as Sandman talks to Eddie Edwards. Edwards interrupts the phone call of Sandman(who appears to have been with the Rascalz) Poor Eddie is lost. He doesn’t recognize his new kendo stick. It’s just not Kenny. So Sandman takes the stick and carves a smiling face christening the new Kenny 2.0. An elated, albeit mentally unstable, Eddie walks away muttering to himself “it is Kenny”.
A vignette plays of Impact World Champion training intertwined with video of Mike Elgin taking him out. After which Elgin responds, calling Cage a coward. He claims he will be the next champion because he’s working while Cage sits at home.
Back in the arena, O.V.E.’s music plays as the Madman Fulton makes his way to the ring, carrying Sami Callihan, for his two on one handicap match against…some guys. No disrespect but their names don’t seem important. Fulton runs through both opponents to start the match. He tackles one of the men into the turnbuckle before whipping into the rope into a spinebuster. He mounts the man choking him. He kicks the other man without getting up. He suplex one man onto the other. Both men are down again as Fulton stalks them. He turns his attention to the second man choking him in the corner. He tosses both men into the corner. He pulls the singlet-ted man in biting his skull. He throws back into the corner at his partner. He tosses one man’s head into the other kicking him and causing him to ddt the other.
Again both are down. He picks them up, one after the other chokeslamming each. He then picks up both in a double chokeslam. He goes to the corner where Sami is screaming instructions. He slaps his monster, Madman Fulton multiple time yelling to “kill them” Fulton hits a sideslam finisher taking out both men for the pinfall.
Callihan grabs the mic after the match calling out Scarlett Bordeaux and Fallah Bah. He mocks both opponents before calling for the Crists to come to the ring for their match. Callihan leads Fulton from the ring as the Crist brothers make their way to the ring. Fallah and Scarlett follow
Jake Crist starts the match against Bah as Crist is thwarted by Fallah’s double axe to the chest knocking Jake to the mat. He knocks him down with several more shots. Crist comes off the ropes and the two exchange holds before Bah flings his opponent to the mat. Callihan picks the ankle of Bah when he hits the ropes provoking the ire of the referee. Fulton and Callihan are ejected from ringside provoking the rage of the Madman who Sami has to physically drag from ringside as he attempts to go after the ref.
Back in the ring, Bah has Dave Crist on the mat dropping an elbow onto the Ohian. The stunned Crist brother leans against the corner. Bah builds up a head of steam as he charges into the corner. Jake pulls his brother from the danger and out of the corner allowing a tag to be made between the two. Jake comes into the match quickly taking Bah to the mat. They cut off the ring with quick tags. Jake and Dave tag out again. Bah is still down. He starts to “Hulk up” as the brothers continue hitting him. They tag again keeping Fallah locked into hold after hold. Bah takes out Jake with a big body block. He rolls over to the corner again bringing in his brother. Bah is cutoff crawling toward his corner. Dave stomps him before he reaches Scarlett in their corner.
Dave slides to the outside taking Scarlett off the apron as Jake attempts a sunset flip pin on Bah. The Big Bah falls on his opponent leaving both on the mat Fallah crawling slowly to his corner again. He makes the tag to Scarlett who enters the match like a house of fire! She dispatches Dave Crist in the corner with a running hip bump. She shoots Jake into his brother in the corner. She takes out Jake with a tilt a whirl ranna that leaves both brothers scrambling to their feet as she climbs the top rope. She takes out O.V.E. with a flying cross body causing both to roll to the outside.
Scarlett motivates Fallah back to his feet with chants of “bah” from her and the crowd. As he gets to his feet Scarlett pulls out the ropes. Fallah launches himself to the outside onto the weary Crist brothers. Scarlett climbs up the turnbuckle and dives outside taking out all the men on the outside with a flip. Scarlett gets back to the apron as Jake Crist rolls into the ring. Dave holds her ankle stalling her from getting to the ring giving Jake time to hit a hard bodyslam on Bordeaux. Dave Crist goes to the top as Jake readies Scarlett for a Doomsday finisher. She recovers hitting a reverse ranna on Jake. Bah takes Dave on his shoulders allowing Scarlett to climb to the top. She dives from the top connecting with Dave Crist (much to the delight of Don Callis).
She rolls Dave for the pinfall who kicks out at two. Scarlett tags in Fallah who drags Dave to the corner. He calls over Scarlett who climbs onto his back for a Bonzai Drop finish. Dave is able to move to send Bah and Scarlett to crashing to the mat missing their target. Jake slides back into the ring distracting the referee as he passing something into his brother. Dave uses the weapon, a roll of quarters, to take out Fallah with a big punch knocking him out and spraying quarters across the ring. Dave makes the cover for the three count. O.V.E. picks up another victory as Scarlett checks on Fallah Bah.
The brothers go after Scarlett bringing out Tessa Blanchard. She explodes into the ring like a firecracker. She throws fists with both brothers before being caught by Dave. Jake misses hitting his brother in the face giving Tessa an escape. She goes to the top rope hitting a diving Magnum kneedriver on Jake Crist.
Melissa Santos interviews Rich Swann and Willie Mack. Willie talks fighting Big Mike Elgin next week. Rich Swann thanks Willie for always having his back. Johnny Impact interrupts Rich reminding him he is on the “Johnny Impact diet”. That he will lose ten pounds when he loses his X-Division title this Saturday
O.V.E. are outside the arena. Callihan is losing his mind about the Crist brothers loss. Sami looks into the camera addressing the Knockouts. He calls out Tessa Blanchard telling her that she needs to prepare for the takeover of Everything! EV-RY THING!
Next up is a knockouts match between Kierra Hogan and Jordynne Grace. Will they settle their differences here tonight? Grace wants the handshake. The Girl on Fire rejects her offer. Hogan grabs her opponents hair but Grace reverses into a whip to the rope. Kierra bounces off the rope and is dropped by Grace. Jordynne goes to the top rope diving back first into a senton position of her opponent. She follows up with a cover for a two count. She picks up Kierra into a Jackhammer stalling to allow the blood to rush to her former friend’s head. Another two count as Hogan crawls into the corner.
Kierra begs off her much larger opponent offering a handshake. She swings her fist at Grace who blocks it slapping her in the face. Grace runs at her opponent but is caught instead by a kick to the face. With her opponent prone in the corner Hogan hits her with a running dropkick. She covers her opponent using the ropes for leverage but is called off by the referee. Hogan drags her groggy opponent into the corner choking her with a boot to the throat. Two well placed kicked and a snapmare set up Jordynne for the sitting dropkick. Another two count for Kierra on Jordynne. She sinches in a headlock on Grace setting her up for a suplex. The powerhouse instead reverses snapping off a suplex of her own sending Kierra to the ropes to assist her back to her feet.
Jordynne hits an elbow and tries to whip Kierra who uses a short arm reversal to stop her opponent’s momentum. She delivers to the face leaving Jordynne Grace facedown on the mat. She rolls her over into a pin. Jordynne Grace kicks out at tow getting back to her feet. Kierra kicks her to the chest as she stands. Kierra running into a spinebuster from Grace. She gets to her feet in the corner Kierra shoots into the big boot from Jordynne. She throws into the turnbuckles launching herself knees first into the spine of Hogan then hitting an elbow. Jordynne plays to the crowd leaving Kierra down in the corner. She hits the splash from the turnbuckle pinning her opponent. Kierra kicks out at two. Jordynne sets her up on the top turnbuckle. Kierra fights her off with a series of punches.
Hogan attempts a sunset bomb but Jordynne blocks. Kierra lets go and kicks her opponent in the back of the knee causing her to fall. Kierra hits the neckbreaker getting another nearfall. Both women are back to their feet Kierra goes for another suplex but is again stopped by Jordynne Grace. She reverses into a short arm elbow blow. Jordynne catches Hogan coming off the rope planting her with spinning sidewalk slam from the tilt a whirl attempt. Kierra fights off the Grace Driver with a series of elbows. She swings and misses an elbow strike opening her up to a strike from Jordynne Grace. She hits more elbows shaking her opponent. She tries to capitalize with an “Eat It” finisher missing leaving her in position for the Grace Driver and pin. Your winner, by pinfall, Jordynne Grace!
We go to the LAX clubhouse for an update from the tag champions. The boys are sleeping and eating. Konan is scouting, watching a video of the Rascalz who are facing LAX. Ortiz and Santana assure Konan they are ready for their match tonight.
It drives Moose nuts that ECW veterans come to IMPACT. Though he admits he used to do the “RVD arm thing”. But that was two decades ago! He challenges RVD to a match. Until he gets his match he vows to make Van Dam’s life a living Hell.
The main event of the evening is a Tag Team Title match between the Rascalz (Dez and Wentz) against champions Ortiz and Santana LAX. Will all of the montages pay off tonight for the Rascalz against LAX? Have the champions in LAX looked past their opponents for the night in the Rascalz?
Wentz of the Rascalz starts the match against Ortiz of LAX. They lock up in the center of the ring with Ortiz taking down Wentz with a knee lock. He rolls Wentz over he whips him into the corner as they stand. He rolls out hitting his opponent with an arm drag takedown. Ortiz rolls up Wentz for a nearfall. LAX confer on the apron as Wentz gets back to his feet. Collar and elbow tie up. Konan is at the announce table on the outside. Back in the Ortiz is manipulating the arm of Wentz with a wristlock. Wentz flips him over sending Ortiz to the mat. He scrambles back to his feet running at Wentz who shoots him off to the rope ducking. Ortiz rolls over him running again, Wentz leapfrogs over his head shooting him off the rope again. Wentz ducks again going to the ropes himself hitting a springboard corkscrew splash.
Ortiz is dazed and trying to make his way back to his feet crawling into his opponent’s corner. Wentz charges in hitting an elbow. Dez of the Rascalz tags himself into the match hopping into the ring as Wentz keeps Ortiz of LAX trapped in the corner. Dex rolls back springs up and charges into the corner. He’s shot over the top rope onto the apron by Ortiz he comes down kicking Ortiz with an enziguri dropping him into the turnbuckle. Dez spring over the top rope hitting a sitting kick into the chest of Ortiz. Next comes Wentz with a bronco buster.
Santana comes in for the assistance but is cut off by Dez who drops down with a blow to the gut as Wentz hits Santana with a kick to the gut setting up the double team. Dez and Wentz land a series of kicks to the torso of Santana with Dez hitting the follow blow; an enziguri to the back of his head which leaves him on all for fours for Wentz who jump stomps onto his back causing Santana to roll to the outside.
Wentz takes the opportunity to spring off his partner’s back to the outside onto both members of LAX on the outside. Wentz of the Rascalz picks up Santana of LAX from the floor as Dez winds up for his own version of an outside dive in the form of a handspring front flip. Back in the ring, Wentz is perched on the top rope over a prone Ortiz. He dives hitting a Swanton bomb followed by a corkscrew by Dez. Wentz goes for the pinfall but it’s broken up at two by Santana. All four men are down in the ring as we go to break.
We return to the ring with LAX in their control having taken control of the match against the Rascalz. Santana is flipping into the ring over Ortiz in the corner. Ortiz rolls through flipping Wentz to his feet as Santana goes to the top rope. Wentz is able to pull down before any damage is done allowing Ortiz to go after Wentz in the corner. Wentz shoots him over the top onto the apron. Wentz turns around tries to whip Santana who reverses whipping him back into the corner where Ortiz grabs his wrists as he climbs the turnbuckle. Santana pops up hitting a back Russian legsweep from the turnbuckle standing Wentz up on his feet sending him into the waiting arms of Ortiz for a jumping spike DDT.
Santana hits Wentz with a deadlift German suplex and bridges into a pin that. Dez breaks up the pinfall kicking Santana’s ribs and goes back to the ring apron. Santana and Wentz are both down in the ring. Santana gets to his feet first grabbing Wentz by the hair pulling him up then chopping his chest so hard he falls back to the mat. He pulls back up into a backbreaker asserting his dominance over his opponent. Santana gets a nearfall. After the kick out Santana argues with ref as Wentz crawls to the bottom rope
Outside the ring, Trey, of the Rascalz who it appears is carrying and drinking from a flask, stumbles around the ring post while his partners face LAX. Santana drags Wentz back to his feet as Wentz tries to mount some offense striking Santana in the ribs with short punches but he counters with chops of his own. Wentz of the Rascalz falls back into the ropes using them to support himself as Santana of LAX tags in his partner. He shoots Wentz off the ropes as Ortiz comes into the ring feeding him into a Uranagi by Ortiz that plants Wentz hard into the mat. Ortiz runs and lands hard on the chest of his opponent before dropping to all fours to allow Santana to use his back to hit a moonsault on a prone Wentz.
Santana goes back to the LAX corner as Ortiz hits a bodysplash into a pinfall that is broken up by Dez who comes in to kick Ortiz in the head. On the outside Trey, now visibly drunk, appears to be getting sick to his stomach. In the ring, Ortiz and Wentz are back up exchanges chops as Wentz struggles to stand. Ortiz locks up with his opponent dragging him into his corner and making the tag to the fresh Santana. Santana comes into the match by climbing the rope and jumping onto the wrist of his opponent dropping Wentz to the mat then knocking Dez off the ring apron. He goes back to Wentz whose head he presses into the bottom rope causing him to scream in agony.
Santana brings him back to his feet in an attempted backdrop that Wentz is able to reverse flipping over his back and landing on his feet. He ducks the clothesline attempt into a springboard kneed to the face of Santana. Both men are down both men in need of a tag. Santana rolls to his corner as Wentz gets the hot tag to Dez. Ortiz and Dez both enter the match at a quick pace charging. Dez ducks a clothesline attempt sliding into Santana in the corner knocking him to the outside. He waits for Ortiz in the corner going over his head as he rushes into the corner hitting the superkick as he lands draping his opponent over the turnbuckle.
Dez runs in hitting the big back elbow followed by a whip out of the corner reversed by Ortiz then reversed by Dez into a striking combo and snap mare into a dropkick to the back sending Ortiz rolling to the outside. Santana slides back into the ring throwing punches at Dex who blocks each blow and hitting a combination of strikes of his own into a cutter before diving between the rope taking out Ortiz on the outside.
Back inside the ring, Wentz of the Rascalz tags himself in as Dez jumps over the rope but missing a backflip wheel kick maneuver as Ortiz of LAX rolls out of the way. He hits the wheel kick on the second attempt as Wentz comes back in the ring hitting Ortiz we open palm strikes and kicks into a springboard move that he misses and rolls into the corner. Ortiz follows him landing a big dropkick into the corner dropping Wentz down to a seating position. Ortiz sets up for a spring maneuver off his back calling for Santana. Wentz pops up catching him mid-move rolling into a pin attempt that Santana escapes hitting a cutter on Dez instead.
Ortiz of LAX rolls up Wentz of the Rascalz for a pinfall that is reversed into a pin attempt by Wentz. The pin attempt is broken up by a well-timed kick by Santana to the neck of Wentz. Ortiz rolls Wentz into another pin attempt with the assist from Santana which is again broken up, this time by Dez. All four men are again down in the ring. In the ring, Santana is back to his feet with Wentz stirring as Ortiz makes the tag to Santana. LAX set up for their signature double team finisher as Dez of the Rascalz crawls between them providing the distraction allowing Wentz to backflip out of harm’s way. Dez hits Ortiz with a massive superkick causing him to roll out of the ring leaving Santana by himself with both Rascalz.
Wentz grabs Santana from behind as Dez lands another superkick this time to Santana. Wentz keeps the wrist of his opponent hitting the jumping knee strikes knocking Santana to the mat. Wentz does his signature standing moonsault and Dez pushes him midair sending him crashing down onto Santana for the cover. Wentz gets a two count before it’s broken up once again by Ortiz. Dez of the Rascalz and Ortiz of LAX are back to feet inside the ring Dez swinging wildly with a double axe handle blow that misses Ortiz who reverses into a big reverse back body drop sending Dez crashing facedown on the mat. Dez rolls to the outside as Wentz runs to the rope popping off only to be caught by Ortiz into a snap powerslam.
Ortiz of LAX rolls to the outside to confront Trey of the Rascalz over the use of his flask. Ortiz takes a huge gulp before being struck in the guy by Dez on the outside of the ring sending the drink into the eyes of the referee. In the ring, Santana pulls Wentz to his feet but he reverses hitting his opponent with shot after shot to the head and chest driving him back against the ropes. Wentz turns his back on his opponent running off the ropes but is caught by a big kick to the head by Santana. He whips who reverses springboarding off the top rope into a huge cutter leaving Santana vulnerable to the double knee strike from Trey who is suddenly on the top rope. Trey is obviously wasted as he attempts a pin on his opponent. A new referee comes to ringside and counts the victory for Trey and the Radicalz awarding them the World Tag Titles!
The original official is telling the second official he made a mistake; that Trey is not even legal in the match. Konan is livid outside the ring as Trey celebrates with one-half of the Tag Titles. The original referee reverses the call giving the match to LAX by disqualification over the Rascalz. LAX remains IMPACT Tag Team Champions!
Originally written by Tavish York